morbidair

sooooo...... FUCK. *clears throat after outburst* so thank god, and no thanks god. i cant pay my next months rent. which mean i cant live there. thank you jesus! however, that means i lose my deposit, have to go home, dont know what to say to the girl im living with, and need cash to make it home. besides the fact that there is NO WAY IN HELL that my car can even make the trip. thanks for nothing jesus. what the fuck is a girl supposed to do. all four days after i finally land a job. i love life.

so..... yah.... i moved out of my house to the town where i go to school. i moved in with this girl i dont like much. she's dramatic, astoundingly selfish, needy, selfish, and inconsiderate. so i move in with her? mistake #3. (#1 being getting in the fight with my mum that resulted in me moving out, #2 actually moving out.) so i live with her. if i go hang out anyone she calls at least once every hour to ask when i'll be home, tell me she's lonely, or bitch about something. seriously, i'll be with my boyfriend having fun all relaxed andshe'll call and it completely ruins my mood... the dumb thing is, i feel awful when she does that. i feel b

break down       let it go there are so many things i want him to know i always knew he wouldnt be back i know it will never be home what the fuck is wrong with me i had so many opportunities i wanted closure       i could have had it i was too afraid of what he would say break down       let it go now he'll never fucking know ive cried so much, and its not his fault i wish my friends saw something besides what he did wrong break down          drop the blade its not what  i want       and yet i only think of bleeding away the pain is it lust     fuck you, no even though i hate hate the pain he is what is keeping it from becom